Friday, November 12, 2010

Barbie's Rock Bottom Playset #2

When last we left our delightful heroine, Barbie, she was unemployed and facing eviction. She spent most of her days crying into her snuggie and wishing she was dead. Fortunately though, the hands of fate smiled up her one day when she accepted a blind date with a friend of Midge's husband. Barbie was a little surprised when he picked her up and took her to a porn shop but, ever the optimist, she persisted with the date.

It was when she visited the restroom of the shop that she discovered something quite shocking. Barbie found a glory hole! Even though she had majored in the arts, Barbie had taken one economics class in college, and that was quite enough to know that sex always sells. Seeing a delightful opportunity to dig herself out of debt, Barbie got her hair bleached (because who better to give a blow job than a blond?), buried her dignity somewhere deep within her, and went to work. At $5 a job, the pay is low, but it's tax free and every little bit helps!

Introducing: Gloryhole Barbie!

Barbie is eager to please with her slutty outfit and her newly blond hair!

A much needed break!
Between "clients" , Barbie likes to relax on the toilet and read the stimulating graffiti.

Barbie is busiest during the midday lunch hour, when married men visit her in droves.

It's hard to keep smiling when your jaw is cramping, but Barbie is a real trooper!

Although it isn't exactly her "dream job", Barbie is certain that this is better than data entry or waiting tables!

Phew. After a rough shift, Barbie likes to eat a few oxys and take a nap on the floor.


  1. I was under the impression that all Barbie dolls were whores. Were they not? Then I must have been doing something rather perverse with them when I was a kid.

    *Side note: this Barbie looks pretty fit. When was it made? I heard a while back that they were going to alter its physical dimensions a bit, so as to provide a more realistic body model to which young girls (and probably boys) could aspire to have.

  2. Joseph, no, they weren't whores. They were astronauts and doctors and teachers and surfers.

    This barbie is new. Mattel did change them a bit by including a slightly wider waist, narrower hips and smaller breasts. They also started making black barbies with more typical facial features, skin tones and hair textures, but Asian Hispanic Barbies still just look like slightly altered white Barbies. I honestly doubt there with ever be a curvy or realistic Barbie though. I also don't think it matters. I played with them pretty consistently as a kid and I never once thought I was supposed to look like one.

  3. "Who better to give a blowjob than a blonde?" Why be so cruel? What is wrong with blondes? That's like saying people who wear glasses are all smart.